You might work with men if.....

• you go to get a beverage and find only 3 drops of water left in the cooler.
• you go get a paper towel to wipe of the spill from filling the cooler and find an empty cardboard tube.
• you reach for sugar to put in your tea to find the container empty in spite of the large case of sugar packets in the cabinet.
• you dramatically change you hair cut/color/style and noone notices.
• you lave your "office shoes" home and end up wearing your sneakers with your pantsuit all day. noone notices.
• coworkers begin conversations with "you need to talk to my wife/girlfriend.."
• coworkers assume you know nothing about sports and might not be interested in using the company box seats at Shea (so SO wrong!).
• you are assumed to be the company authority on stain removal.
• you get married and it doesn't occur to anyone that you may have changed your name.

my apologies to Mr. Foxworthy.

Kitchen Shit

When digging out the bikes the other day, I had to move a bunch of Todd's music crap (I'm sure it is wonderful, but it isn't mine, so it's crap). Behind that were 2 boxes sitting on the backseat of a minivan we traded in 3 years ago (Todd's minivan. I stand behind my "no sliding door' policy). Behind that I found the bikes.

I brought the two boxes into the kitchen, but I didn't get to unpack them until last night. one box was marked only "fragile". It contained the remainder of the Easter decorations that I was looking for 6 weeks ago (and the last 2 Easters as well).

The second box was labeled in my darling hsuband's hand "kitchen shit". I bet you are asking yourself what "kitchen shit" consists of. Here is a list:

• the "chip" portion of my chip 'n dip set (the "dip" was unpacked and put away over a year ago).
• 2 candleholders that belong in the master bedroom.
• 1 crystal wine glass (it was happy to be reuinted with its friends!)
• 1 depression glass bud vase
• a copy of "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding"
• my garden clogs
• 1 pair Doc Martins
• 1 pair leather sandals
• 1 softball cleat (notice I didn't say pair?)
• 3 purses I don't remember owning
• a small wall mirror that also belongs in my bedroom

who packed that box? monkeys? I'd blame it on Todd, but as I recall he did more of the labeling, carrying and complaining than any actual packing.